Mother's Day sermon

This one was a hard one to write. When you know that there will be people who have not been able to have children or who have lost their child you cannot just write a sermon to celebrate motherhood without aknowledging the pain and loss there is. I don't know if I managed what I wanted which was to try to offer a new perspective.

It was in fact something new I realized about God when writing this. To me the fact that God is a Parent and the fact that this really means that parenthood is something inherent in us was and is a new way of looking at our calling as Christians and at life itself.

This was and is important to me and my hope is that it was and is to at least some who heard or now read this sermon, too.

Jesus and Peter

When Jesus and his disciples had finished eating, he asked, "Simon son of John, do you love me more than the others do?"] Simon Peter answered, "Yes, Lord, you know I do!"

"Then feed my lambs," Jesus said.

Jesus asked a second time, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"

Peter answered, "Yes, Lord, you know I love you!"

"Then take care of my sheep," Jesus told him.

Jesus asked a third time, "Simon son of John, do you love me?"

Peter was hurt because Jesus had asked him three times if he loved him. So he told Jesus, "Lord, you know everything. You know I love you."

Jesus replied, "Feed my sheep. I tell you for certain that when you were a young man, you dressed yourself and went wherever you wanted to go. But when you are old, you will hold out your hands. Then others will wrap your belt around you and lead you where you don't want to go."

Jesus said this to tell how Peter would die and bring honor to God. Then he said to Peter, "Follow me!"

Today is Mother’s Day in many countries including Finland; something my mother always really disliked. If I remember right it had something to do with the fact that she was a mother every day of the year and she didn’t like the idea that the other 364 days then would not count for anything. As she sadly passed away already 12 years ago I can’t check with her about details of her reasoning but I think this is how it went and I understand her point of view.

I did, however, ignore her complaints and gave her presents and a card anyway. Because the thing is that, from my perspective – and I am now a mom myself - Mother’s Day really is not about mothers and neither is Father’s Day about fathers. I think it is about children. And I think that this is how it should be and that it is a really good thing, too.

I think it is important to teach children about the joy of giving and the joy of doing something nice for another person. With very small children it is understandable that it starts with their parents or caretakers how ever the case may be.

My daughter is now three and just starting to understand about gifts and cards. Mainly from the point of view wanting to have them but a couple of times I have gotten to see the timid joy and pride on the face of her when she presents someone else or me with her gift. And that moment is precious beyond words.

I would not want to change those moments for anything in the world. I want her to have that feeling. I want her to always want to be a giver. I want her to realize just how wonderful it is to make another person smile and happy. I want that for all children in the world. In fact, I want that for everyone in the world.

But I understand - better than you might think - how a Mother’s day like many other days that emphasize family can bring hurt. When you haven’t children even though you dearly wanted to have them, when your own childhood has been something that scarred you and you just want to forget everything that had to do with your family, when you have lost your child or children Mother’s day and Father’s Day can bring such great sadness with them.

The solution could be to not to celebrate them but, I think, these days bring such joy to the mothers, grandmothers and great grandmothers - and fathers - of the world that it would be a pity. Also, the thing is, that even in the midst of my grief for loosing my mother I personally did want there to be a Mother’s day. I wanted to go pick flowers for her and to take them to her grave. I wanted to be reminded. I wanted to show my respect, love and thankfulness for her and I was thankful for a day when this was and is done by all here in Finland and in many other parts of the world, too.

Having said that, I do also think there is a need for us to find other ways of looking at celebrating Mother’s Day. As Christians we have a Heavenly Parent, we have God. We are used to talking about Him as the Father, this is how Jesus referred to Him, but God is first and foremost a Parent. He is as much maternal as he is paternal. He created women and men to be like Him. A mother is as much the image of God as a father is. Neither is more than the other and neither is more than all those who are not parents. The point is quite simply that God’s parenthood is expressed both in feminine and masculine forms and in all of us.

This service is Mother’s Day service and we are called today especially to thank God for His parenthood. In addition, we are certainly also called to thank God for our mothers and grandmothers and their mothers. Without them we would not be here.

But we are also called to thank God for each and everyone of those women - and men - who have been mothers to others by giving nourishment, love, affection, protection, aid and their time irrespective of what their marital status is or of being a parent or not.

Parenthood is God’s quality and therefore, because He created us to be like Him, it is our quality. Weather we have children or will ever have children is in fact not a prerequisite to having the job. Parenthood is our calling as is. It doesn’t mean we all have to love babies, wipe bums, endure sleepless nights or anything of the sort. What it does mean is that we are called to give expression to parenthood in our relationship to the world surrounding us. By that I mean taking responsibility like God, a parent, does, setting boundaries, loving unconditionally, helping those in need and encouraging others.

This is what I think Jesus clearly calls Peter to do in today’s reading. “Feed my lambs, take care of my sheep, feed my sheep.” In other words, be the father of my followers, be the shepherd of my flock.

This sentiment still echoes in the practice of those churches where priests are called Father or even Mother. Admittedly, you’ll always make me giggle if you refer to me as Mother Mia but that’s just me. I can’t help it but Abba’s song Mamma Mia starts ringing in my head.

The fact is that Jesus knew that the church would need leaders. The church would need people who take responsibility and who would be willing to sacrifice a lot - or in Peter’s case everything since he lost his life, too, because of being a Christian, because of being a follower of Christ.

As we grow as Christians God gently leads us to parenthood. It can express itself it a multitude of ways and have nothing to do with children or even necessarily with people but I am certain that this calling is for everyone.

Parenthood in every sense is a tough job, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise even though Peter’s fate is thankfully today quite unlikely – but it is also a rewarding one filled with joy and blessings. And here is my question for you to bonder: What do you think, how does God call you today to parenthood?

Let us pray:

Gracious God,

we thank you for adopting us into your family through the miracle of your grace, and for calling us to be brothers and sisters to each other.

Today, loving God, we pray for our mothers:

• who cared for us when we were helpless

• who comforted us when we were hurt

• whose love and care we often took for granted.

Today we pray for:

• those who are grieving the loss of their mother,

• those who never knew their biological mother, and now yearn for her

• those who have experienced the wonder of an adopted mother's love

• the families separated by war or conflict.

• Lord, give them special blessings.

Keep us united with you and with each other, so that we can be and become all that we are meant to be. Amen.